So it was only fitting that today I received an email from my boyfriend in High School. His name is Zachary, we dated 4 years from ages 16-19. So, I'm throwing this out to the world to see if you all share in my butterfly stomach. Early last year I contacted him to sort of mend fences. The conversation went quite well and I was able to forgo my hatred toward him. This left me in a bit of a quandary because now, we don't speak on a regular basis instead I will get random emails. This happened last year when I got an email with a photo of his two little girls. As happy as I was for him it was difficult to see his children, especially when one looks exactly like him. I let it go and time went on...until today I get another photo with another daughter. Kill me already! I'm glad that we're friends and I want it to continue on exactly how we are, but it doesn't make it any easier to see his children. And I wonder if I would be better off with the crappy hate I had instead. I did respond with my pregnant news, hoping somewhere deep down the queasy feelings I have were finally reciprocated. ..he didn't respond.
Lame I know...thoughts?
This was Senior Prom. I rented a pirate wench dress, borrowed some sweet boots from the theater and sported my favorite fishnets. Can you believe he wouldn't dress up as a pirate? Actually, I'm not sure anyone would. What a dork I was. 
So, this might be just me but this photo was taken days before we broke up and I remember this moment quite vividly. Notice he didn't put his arm around me...you can totally see it in my face. I knew something was up.Our relationship was awesome for the time, just not meant to be forever. I know that there are several people made for each other it's just a matter of which one you choose. Where I know I could have married him, I would definitely not be as happy as I am now. I chose very wisely with Jim, I can't imagine a more perfect person than him for me.
11 comments:
Wow. Wow. Wow. Was he in River Dance?
I think the shaved look is better for him. Your pirate wench outfit is wenchy. I'm glad you found Jim too. You guys look like you have so much fun together.
And great comments on the Willards. I love it when the parents want so bad for their kids to end up together. I wonder who I'll be doing that with for my kids!
All I gotta say is . . . damn girl . . . your legs look hot in that pirate dress!
So here are my comments about this last post.. maybe I choose to do this instead of watching a million High School Musical spots in a row..
How fitting..
and after reading Ed's Comments I feel like I am back in High School..
I think anyone that has had a relationship for 4 years would get butterfly's..
and who wears a Pirate dress to Prom..LOL..
(I of course had a red suit for the prom..)
What I find odd is that he still insists on sending you pics of his kids that he Obviously wanted to have with you..
so don't get mad baby, just cause he still thinks about you..
Love you.. --Jim
Brave post!
Everyone still has those certain few people they think about every now and then. One always wonders what if...
But all I know is Jim is MUCH HOTTER than that guy FOR SURE.
So glad you guys broke it off and you married Jim, otherwise we would have never met. Love ya.
This was such a beautiful and personal insight into your thoughts and feelings. Thank you for trusting us.
Glimpses into another's heart are the most rewarding experiences I can ever hope to have. Thank you for sharing.
We're all so blessed to have you in our lives.
I had one of these boyfriends - geez they suck.
Nice wench costume. :)
I love your blog...I just spent 30 minutes reading it. You are such an interesting person. About the boyfriend...do you ever wonder why on earth did you even have one, they caused me so much grief...live and learn. Being married is much better than dating.
I remember your telling me, back then, that you had contacted Zach...and now it's interesting to read via e-mail. I think everyone on the planet has a first or second love that they always remember and wonder about, with butterflies, even though they are very happily married. It's just common nature. By the way, I loved seeing the prom pictures. You were always so unique and extra cute in your style of dress. Hey, I just realized that Zach and Jim have a hair thing in common...you never see either one of them with the same hair twice in a row.
I remember Zach. Good times. I love seeing all the old photos of you. I remember going shopping at a few thrift stores. What treasures!
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